Have you ever been dumped by a girl out of nowhere, with no idea of what you did wrong? Thinking; ‘But I gave her everything she wanted’?
Today I’m going to be giving you some honest and real insight into the female mind. The truth is, women can quickly lose interest when they sense that their man has become ‘whipped’.
What do I mean by ‘whipped’? When a guy gives up his POWER in the relationship.
How to know that you have become ‘whipped’:
• Your girlfriend has become bossy and demanding. You can’t seem to make her happy.
• Your girlfriend is less interested in sex. You keep hearing; “I’m not in the mood”.
• Your girlfriend gets annoyed when you try to please her. She says things like; “Why is it always MY choice?”
I’m sure that many guys out there have experienced this situation with at least one woman in their life. But how does this happen?
Okay guys, let me explain the common scenario in which a girl loses interest in her man (the real, hard truth):
Aaron and Bridget’s relationship started off being hot, passionate and amazing. Sexual attraction was off the scales, Bridget was blissfully happy and they simply couldn’t get enough of one another.
But as the relationship progressed, Aaron grew comfortable with the way things were and stopped doing the things which most attracted Bridget to him in the first place.
For instance, he stopped surprising her with cute little gifts and messages. He stopped initiating going out for special dates with Bridget, in favor of staying home and watching TV together.
He stopped playing with his sports team as much and would often blow off social occasions he used to enjoy in order to be able to spend more time with Bridget.
And when Bridget asked Aaron what he would like to do together that weekend, she seemed to always get the same reply; “Whatever you want to do babe. I don’t mind”.
Although it doesn’t sound like Aaron was doing anything wrong, Bridget’s attraction towards him was starting to dwindle.
She started doing and saying things that made no sense to Aaron. For instance, complaining about how they were always doing that things that SHE wanted to do.
And Bridget never seemed to be in the mood for sex anymore. Whenever Aaron tried to initiate it, no matter how romantically, she would always come up with some excuse.
At this point, Aaron had begun to lose control in the relationship and he had NO IDEA why. He was thinking “What has happened to the sweet, sexy, affectionate girl I first met?”
Aaron tried to make things better with Bridget by doing more to please her. He showed an extra interest in listening to her problems, cleaned her car for her and told her that he was free all weekend and would like to do whatever she wanted.
The trouble was, the more Aaron tried to please Bridget, the more she got annoyed at him and rejected his attempts.
Why? Because having all of the control in the relationship was making Bridget feel less feminine and desirable. The more Aaron lay himself at her feet, the more Bridget felt dominant, masculine and unappealing.
She didn’t WANT to feel bossy and demanding. She never asked to be in this position in the relationship.
Yet Aaron seemed to have let go of his ‘manliness’ and was continuously encouraging HER to lead the way.
Although Bridget did want to have SOME say in the relationship, she never wanted to feel that she had a puppy dog by her side.
She began to really miss the times when Aaron used to take the lead, and mourn for what the relationship had been.
After this went on for a while, Bridget decided to end the relationship.
And poor Aaron was left in anguish, thinking “What did I do wrong? I gave her everything she wanted…”
Do you see now what went wrong there? Why Bridget lost interest in the relationship?
It wasn’t that she didn’t like Aaron as a person, it’s that she didn’t like the way his behavior made her FEEL.
The more Aaron handed the reins over to Bridget, less attractive and feminine she felt. Resulting in Bridget having less interest in sex and the relationship in general.
Although it’s important that both relationship partners have power in a relationship, the bottom line is that all women have a need to feel cared for, protected and pursued by their man.
And if they’re not feeling it, it can put pretty big holes in their attraction tanks.
But don’t worry – if your girl has started to show any of the warning signs above, it IS possible to pull her back to you.
In order to stay ATTRACTIVE to the woman you are with, here’s what you need to do:
Put on the brakes
Put a bit of distance between you and your girlfriend – so that she starts missing you and stops simply EXPECTING you to call or text her.
This doesn’t mean you should stop making an effort in your relationship. In fact, quite the opposite. It means that by making yourself a little unavailable, you are showing her the catch you are.
So that when you DO see your girlfriend, you will have taken back a bit of that control. You can start taking the lead and sweeping her off her feet all over again.
Be a leader
Saying “I don’t know, you choose” and “It’s up to you’ all the time is NOT going to do you any favors. In fact, it is going to make your relationship WORSE.
Women love men who TAKE THE LEAD.
So instead of leaving the decision up to her, YOU decide what you should do this Saturday.
Take your girl out somewhere YOU have planned. Surprise her – make it fun and exciting. She will love you for it.
Have your own life
An attractive person has a life – whether they are in a relationship or single.
Keep up your own interests, hobbies and friendships when you are in your relationship. Giving up who you are in order to spend more time with your girl could actually end up driving her away.
When your girlfriend sees you doing the things you are passionate about, you will be all the more appealing to her. So stop trying to be her succumb to her every need and focus on YOU for a change.
Remember, she likes you for who you are.
Let her do things for YOU for a change
The truth is, catering for your girlfriend’s every need won’t necessarily make her like you more. But when she does things for YOU, she WILL like you more.
This is a proven psychological fact – we like those who we do favors for.
Why? Because when you invest your time and energy into someone, this sends a powerful message to your brain saying “If I am doing something for this person, I must like them”.
Asking your girl for a special request every once and a while will demonstrate to her that you have self-confidence and are someone to be valued. For instance, asking her for a back rub after a hard gym sesh.
You ARE a man of value. So be sure to follow this advice, and you will always have a happy woman by your side.
Brooke Ryan,
Author.
www.MeetYourSweet.com